tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post8462827516933212417..comments2023-11-03T06:56:05.537-07:00Comments on 10 Steps to Finding Your Happy Place (and Staying There): Arrows into FlowersGalen Pearlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-66560988230402267692016-02-22T07:38:41.740-08:002016-02-22T07:38:41.740-08:00Thanks, Richard. I published this post a while bac...Thanks, Richard. I published this post a while back, so your comment gave me a chance to go back and remember the challenging situation that was going on when I wrote it. What a great reminder to myself to embrace the wisdom of your comment. I hope you will visit my new blog http://galenpearl.blogspot.com/Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-88654096359310665492016-02-21T21:16:40.293-08:002016-02-21T21:16:40.293-08:00He who realizes the body as insubstantial and impe...He who realizes the body as insubstantial and impermanent will break the flower pointed arrow of Mara and never see the king of death. Verse 46 of dhammapada. It seems that in this verse the flower pointed arrow,or the temptations of life that make us cling to life and suffering, is what is being pointed at...we are entranced by the fragrance of our finite existence and cling to it, but realizing impermanence allows us to let go and not cling to our individual existence.<br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01814869437381960423noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-75912321380540206432013-02-12T06:52:24.177-08:002013-02-12T06:52:24.177-08:00guess it was not a coincidence you wrote this post...guess it was not a coincidence you wrote this post just as I needed it!! i am dealing with the same sort of struggles...trying to remain faithful is a challenge..but i know the best way...<br />momto8https://www.blogger.com/profile/13964950285763339907noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-35006049717836802292013-02-11T16:53:48.891-08:002013-02-11T16:53:48.891-08:00Katherine, I think that is certainly the case here...Katherine, I think that is certainly the case here. This other person is in a lot of inner pain. Keeping that in mind does help, as you say. I'll check out the book you mentioned. Speaking of books, I finished yours. What a great story, and great lessons to go with it! Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-47909302661313679212013-02-11T10:52:05.908-08:002013-02-11T10:52:05.908-08:00Bjorn, Welcome! And thank you for your insightful ...Bjorn, Welcome! And thank you for your insightful comment on my guest post at Vishnu's blog. This arrows to flowers imagery has been so helpful to me lately. I use it a lot! I'm glad you stumbled across my blog, too. Thanks for commenting and I hope to see you again.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-76651323547161712682013-02-11T10:35:28.664-08:002013-02-11T10:35:28.664-08:00I have written about Mara on my blog too. I had a ...I have written about Mara on my blog too. I had a similar situation. I find that a person who is directing anger towards anyone is suffering immensely. The first person that an angry person hurts is him or herself. This allows me to have compassion for my attacker, even though I know it is not easy. I like your image or arrow turning to flowers. Yester day my husband, the monk I married, gave me a book called The Second Book of the Tao by Stephen Mitchell. I plan to write about it on my blog. I was going through a few emotional hurdles and it brought me right back to my center where things are as they are. I felt peace. Thanks for your words here and I hope you find peace in this situation ^_^!Katherine Jenkinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16732133918969183030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-41931096091187545142013-02-11T07:09:38.914-08:002013-02-11T07:09:38.914-08:00Haha, thanks Galen, yep I do have a blog, it is ww...Haha, thanks Galen, yep I do have a blog, it is www.diamondmine.me/blog - is that sufficient or do I need to link to Google+ somehow?<br />Blessings<br />PhilAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17746375890835165574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-80229135554277070782013-02-11T04:41:59.092-08:002013-02-11T04:41:59.092-08:00Galen, I went from your guest post on Vishnu's...Galen, I went from your guest post on Vishnu's Virtues to reading this post! What a powerful image. Open hostility is so jarring and tough to deal with but picturing arrows that turn to flowers has got to be some of the best use of mental imagery I've come across. Thank you very much! I am glad I stumbled across your blog!Bjorn Karlmanhttp://culturemutt.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-91972128931158982712013-02-10T17:56:36.691-08:002013-02-10T17:56:36.691-08:00Phil, Your name links back to your Google+ profile...Phil, Your name links back to your Google+ profile, but not to your blog. I can't get to your blog from your name. Can yo change that so that I and other readers can find your blog? Of course, I'm making an assumption that you have one!Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-20331704285554712212013-02-10T17:24:45.656-08:002013-02-10T17:24:45.656-08:00LeAnn, You always say the nicest things. Your comm...LeAnn, You always say the nicest things. Your comments make my day. Thank you.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-35265984422034351672013-02-10T15:30:22.326-08:002013-02-10T15:30:22.326-08:00You are such a treasure. I love your subjects and ...You are such a treasure. I love your subjects and your learning moments. You are a great teacher and I always feel enlightened when I read your post. This was one to ponder. <br />Blessings!LeAnnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18107717294803352571noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-65677729279661954142013-02-10T15:28:28.962-08:002013-02-10T15:28:28.962-08:00Hey, Chris! I was lucky to have a good therapist, ...Hey, Chris! I was lucky to have a good therapist, too, some years back. Like yours, she helped me look underneath my feelings for the thoughts and beliefs that were causing me so much distress and taught me that I could choose differently, creating a different perception. Thanks for commenting. Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-52398030521808726492013-02-10T15:26:31.416-08:002013-02-10T15:26:31.416-08:00Tom I agree with Bob, too (as I usually do!). I ca...Tom I agree with Bob, too (as I usually do!). I can clearly see the pain that is in the heart of this other person. Nevertheless, it is challenging to hold on to that awareness when I or my loved ones are the target of such anger. I just keep coming back to your and Bob's perspective. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-19365106462177747802013-02-10T15:24:15.737-08:002013-02-10T15:24:15.737-08:00Bonnie, Fear and defensiveness are such a natural ...Bonnie, Fear and defensiveness are such a natural response. We really have to train ourselves to pause and respond in a loving way, which, as Ben pointed out above, is not necessarily a passive way. Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-69438141513163557092013-02-10T15:22:49.013-08:002013-02-10T15:22:49.013-08:00Ben, I see your point, and the challenge, I think,...Ben, I see your point, and the challenge, I think, is to respond appropriately without perceiving being attacked or attacking in return. I don't think that is necessarily the same thing as being passive. <br /><br />One of the best examples I can think of is the response of the Amish community when a man went into one of their schools and shot ten little girls, before killing himself. The community responded to this horrible tragedy with compassion for him and his family. Had he lived, according to a book I read about them afterwards, they would have fully supported whatever consequences the law provided...and then they would have visited him in prison.<br /><br />In my situation, I've taken steps that I believe are appropriate to resolve the legal aspects of the problem. My challenge is to take those steps without becoming fearful and angry in response to the other person's hostility. <br /><br />It's a bit like the image of the mirrors turning outward that Julie described in an earlier comment. It also reminds me of the way we learn to use energy in martial arts. Rather than thinking in terms of attacking, we try to think in terms of turning our opponent's energy back towards him. When our own "power" is great, it is invulnerable. The opponent is fighting with himself. I probably didn't explain that very well, but perhaps you get the idea. Again the mirror image. <br /><br />So I agree with you that passivity is not always the appropriate path. But neither is engaging in an angry or vengeful response. Maybe the right motto is "defend with love." Hmm. Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-22997763522074969582013-02-10T11:57:40.949-08:002013-02-10T11:57:40.949-08:00What an impactful and useful image. It reminds me ...What an impactful and useful image. It reminds me of the life-changing light bulb that went off in therapy for me years ago with the concept that the only thing we can change about our situation is our perception of it and reaction to it.<br />I suddenly realized then that an attack/comment/attitude/judgement/etc is so much more about the person weilding it, and that perspective has so often given me relief since that day.<br />I also love hearing that message in new ways, with added dimension, so thank you for this post!<br />-Chris at FlashMemoirs.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-54000912512543244142013-02-09T20:14:16.578-08:002013-02-09T20:14:16.578-08:00I agree with Bob Lowry -- most hostility that is d...I agree with Bob Lowry -- most hostility that is directed at us is really anger that the person feels toward him/herself. The bad feelings have less to do with us, and more to do with them. So your story, your perspective, is absolutely a wonderful way to look at it all.Tomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08611148987085476580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-43008417968369231372013-02-09T20:03:47.084-08:002013-02-09T20:03:47.084-08:00Very interesting post. It makes me think hard abou...Very interesting post. It makes me think hard about how I am sometimes too quick in defense and I forget to forgive. Grandma Bonniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16962177773337228437noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-30944776060198611142013-02-09T19:48:42.757-08:002013-02-09T19:48:42.757-08:00While I agree it's good to be able to handle s...While I agree it's good to be able to handle stuff coming at you, being passive and not dealing with it can be just as negative. There is definately times you have to fight, and ignoring that reality won't stop the other person doing what they are doing.<br /><br />-BenBenhttp://www.youremotionalfreedom.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-63626120339367943402013-02-09T17:50:20.976-08:002013-02-09T17:50:20.976-08:00Of course, Vishnu, I write just for you. I thought...Of course, Vishnu, I write just for you. I thought you knew! I'm glad that my thoughts are timely for your life, too. We'll both get through this! Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-41181279801988966722013-02-09T17:49:21.927-08:002013-02-09T17:49:21.927-08:00Beth, Thanks for your kind words and for sharing t...Beth, Thanks for your kind words and for sharing the quote. I laughed at the captain part because my grandson's other grandmother, his great-grandmother actually, always says that he is the captain of his ship. His soul, too, I guess! I'm going to write this one down to get me through the next week. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-73555928594997937852013-02-09T17:47:23.732-08:002013-02-09T17:47:23.732-08:00Patricia, I have a friend who is doing the trainin...Patricia, I have a friend who is doing the training now in Compassionate Communication. She says it's great. You are right that this is a workout for the emotions--that's what it feels like! Thanks so much for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-22476463701942311072013-02-09T17:45:44.068-08:002013-02-09T17:45:44.068-08:00Phil, I have that book, too. Thank you so much for...Phil, I have that book, too. Thank you so much for sharing your song. How beautiful and completely apropos! Thanks for your comment.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-28167807766067999862013-02-09T17:43:54.172-08:002013-02-09T17:43:54.172-08:00Pam, Thanks for your comment.Pam, Thanks for your comment.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-31684710082883032632013-02-09T17:43:38.250-08:002013-02-09T17:43:38.250-08:00Jodi, All good thoughts from the Course. The serie...Jodi, All good thoughts from the Course. The series of lessons that I'm reviewing now are very timely. I had not thought about the forgiving myself part. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.com