tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post793627478905953914..comments2023-11-03T06:56:05.537-07:00Comments on 10 Steps to Finding Your Happy Place (and Staying There): Wonderfully MadeGalen Pearlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comBlogger65125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-34830423093183542672012-12-14T08:43:05.508-08:002012-12-14T08:43:05.508-08:00Madeline, You add an important aspect to this topi...Madeline, You add an important aspect to this topic by connecting it to health. In your career, you have seen the impact of this pervasive belief in unworthiness. Thanks for adding this information. I'm a big fan of Carolyn Myss, and saw her speak once. Her notion of sacred contracts was fascinating to me since I taught contract law for twenty years! Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-61950603545529679072012-12-14T06:24:29.416-08:002012-12-14T06:24:29.416-08:00I am late reading this post-- I have had a 27 yea...I am late reading this post-- I have had a 27 year career as a women's health nurse practitioner (retired now) and I can agree with you that LOW SELF ESTEEM and inability to SHINE is one of women's major issues.It is a health issue.It is a spiritual issue. When women dont' value themselves, they tend to put everyone else' needs first, That means no time for exercise, deep breathing, meditation, a bike ride, or an afternoon spent doing nothing or just going to the movies with a girlfriend.<br /><br />I spent a major part of my visits with women planting seeds of self-care, self-love, and embracing the beauty that each of us is.And taking some TIME OUTS for SELF.. a nap! A good book! a long drive in the country... whatever.... <br /><br />Many women, in particular, do not seem to know why they are here, what they are "meant" to be doing, and in this lack of self care, don[t do things for themselves that promote their OWN path... <br /><br />Carolyn Myss is one of my teachers..she mentioned that life purpose is sometimes so very humble. We are not all actors or CEO's or artists..it may be that your purpose is to "be the brightest light on your block..".. which to me, means, when you smile at the elder man at the mailbox, or bake a pan of cookies, or take time to stroke your cat and give her a few extra treats-- you are wildly fulfilling your divine purpose and you are way more than "good enough.." You are a bright shining light on this planet!<br /><br />AND if you happen to be a CEO, and enjoy it, well..SHINE ON ,girl! Mentor other women! Bask in your achievements once in a while.<br /><br />I love your posts Galen! They make me think and feel.. I look forward to coming up with some "topic" or approach in 2013 to start blogging again also..<br /><br />Happy holidays and blessings to you and yours.... Madeline Hillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15923710592045313500noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-22827999420579575022012-12-02T10:17:44.242-08:002012-12-02T10:17:44.242-08:00Kathi, Your name links to your profile but your pr...Kathi, Your name links to your profile but your profile does not link to your blog. Can you please include the link to your blog so that readers can find you? Thanks!Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-67820194182705659792012-12-02T10:01:03.298-08:002012-12-02T10:01:03.298-08:00G Angela, When I click on your name, it links to y...G Angela, When I click on your name, it links to your profile, but your profile does not have a link to your blog. Can you change that so that I and other readers can get to your blog? Or could you provide a link in your comment? Thanks!Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-35402576603758972242012-12-01T16:20:20.839-08:002012-12-01T16:20:20.839-08:00Karen, For some reason my reply button is not work...Karen, For some reason my reply button is not working! Anyway, that is a great story about the scout exercise. I didn't think of putting myself down either! Thanks for commenting.<br /><br />Nicole, You are indeed all of that and more. Thank you for sharing your gifts and your acknowledgment of them!Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-45849271717766979382012-11-30T20:15:57.570-08:002012-11-30T20:15:57.570-08:00But where are the answers to your question? The an...But where are the answers to your question? The answers with no apologies!? I am a spiritual, angelic being sent here to spread light on the hidden places of dreams. I am laughter and radiance, sexy, earthy, honest and determined. Words are my craft. I am mystical, curious and firey. And I don't apologize for these things.Nicole~http://www.nicoletilde.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-63479553785486437702012-11-30T09:49:12.682-08:002012-11-30T09:49:12.682-08:00Amazing post! Thank you. It comes in rather timely...Amazing post! Thank you. It comes in rather timely too, for me. It's funny though as I read through this one special time kept popping in my thoughts. While on a girl scout outing with my daughter, there were a few mothers and all the girls grouped around a speaker. The woman was quite wise- in her field, and she asked everyone to list on a piece of paper who the most important person was. Well many listed God as number one- but what she was trying to bring out for all the girls and we moms too- is that we ourselves have to be number one first for ourselves- otherwise we won't survive or be there for anyone else. 21 Witshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00071361755673253230noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-61418334107623209002012-11-30T08:17:20.192-08:002012-11-30T08:17:20.192-08:00Corinne, You and other readers have really hit on ...Corinne, You and other readers have really hit on an important point about praise/bragging versus celebrating our gifts. It's a fine line, isn't it? We are taught to strive to be better all the time, which suggests that we are never okay just the way we are. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-38292305595166710242012-11-30T08:14:42.952-08:002012-11-30T08:14:42.952-08:00Mary, Thanks for adding your insight to the discus...Mary, Thanks for adding your insight to the discussion. I thought it was a cultural dilemma, too, but as I'm reading the comments from readers from different countries/cultures, now I'm not so sure. In the US culture, I have looked back at our cultural roots to see if I can gain some understanding. I can't help but think that the doctrine of original sin must play some part. <br /><br />Love your description of yourself. How lovely. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-41542636297121857922012-11-30T07:54:07.988-08:002012-11-30T07:54:07.988-08:00In India, in my generation at least, it was not co...In India, in my generation at least, it was not considered a good idea to praise/compliment children for fear it would go to their heads. As a result children grew up finding it hard to see the good in themselves. Having done a lot of training, I'm always amazed at how people find it easier to introduce themselves by what they 'do' rather than what they 'are'. I also find that when you ask people to make a list of their good qualities, they will struggle, but if you ask them to list out areas to work on, they can't stop writing! :)<br />I have learned the power of self-affirmation and practice it often, Galen. Corinne Rodrigueshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11142098428026084994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-66003034245323597122012-11-30T04:08:52.513-08:002012-11-30T04:08:52.513-08:00Galen, I believe that self-hatred is a cultural di...Galen, I believe that self-hatred is a cultural dilemma, beginning at a very young age for women. We are taught what certain behaviors are appropriate and what behaviors are not in such a way that we begin to use society to influence who we are and how we act. It is very sad. It also seems to be more prevalent as our nation moves away from the belief of God. <br />As I was growing up, I can remember my mother saying "things are so different now from when I was growing up". I remember thinking to myself that I would never say those words because I tired of them. But here I am, a mother of 2 teenagers, and I can't help but to share with my children how different things are now from when I grew up LOL.<br />I'm not quite sure where the self hatred comes from. My daughter attended public school through 5th grade. From then on, she has been at home. Even with that short time of societal influence, she has the teenage affliction of doubt and feeling that she's not 'as good' as other girls. <br />Regarding your exercise, I would describe myself as how my husband does: a quiet, compassionate woman who is confident within herself.<br />Have a great weekend Galen!Mary Hudak-Collins livingthescripture.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18181851742870395058noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-87164911766924022242012-11-29T11:46:19.081-08:002012-11-29T11:46:19.081-08:00Lori, I think you have hit on the main issue. Is ...Lori, I think you have hit on the main issue. Is it bragging to acknowledge that we are worthy of love? To me, it is humbling to realize that I have been blessed with a beauty of soul and spirit that I take no credit for. It is mine as it is everyone's. I need not hide it, but rather rejoice and let it shine. To me, bragging is taking credit for something that separates me from someone else and, at least in my own eyes, sets me apart and above. What I am talking about here, in contrast, is the light of perfect love that shines in all of us and unites us. Thanks for pointing out this distinction.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-2147748182836076102012-11-29T11:37:26.734-08:002012-11-29T11:37:26.734-08:00Hi Galen,
That's an interesting exercise. It&#...Hi Galen,<br />That's an interesting exercise. It's hard for us to claim the good traits and all to easy for us to acknowledge the bad ones.O wonder if it's because we were raised to be humble and not to brag!<br />:-)<br />LoriLori Gosselinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05438402657014025086noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-82198867493642186482012-11-29T09:50:32.714-08:002012-11-29T09:50:32.714-08:00Rimly, I'm sure you're right that your inn...Rimly, I'm sure you're right that your inner beauty and pure heart attract the same qualities in others. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-60769973105913506442012-11-29T00:28:18.418-08:002012-11-29T00:28:18.418-08:00I was like that, uncomfortable with praise. But to...I was like that, uncomfortable with praise. But today I ask the people close to me what they find the most attractive quality in me. My son says, my generosity, my strength and my pure heart. I have had a quite a few say how beautiful my heart is. I believe it is and that is why I have such beautiful people around me.<br /><br />http://rimlybezbaruah.blogspot.in/2012/11/breaking.htmlRimlyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04800381730067608251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-71475564924413520882012-11-28T18:52:02.248-08:002012-11-28T18:52:02.248-08:00Cathy, Thanks for your insight about keeping women...Cathy, Thanks for your insight about keeping women in the shadows. It does seem to get better, and yet, this reluctance to value ourselves, as men or women, runs deep. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-33068046264031964392012-11-28T18:50:07.812-08:002012-11-28T18:50:07.812-08:00Jodi, Thanks for your insights, and no you aren...Jodi, Thanks for your insights, and no you aren't repeating. What an interesting observation about individualistic versus communal cultures! I had not thought of that. It makes sense from the perspective of A Course in Miracles, which focuses on our mistaken perception of separation from each other, which creates fear. You've given me something to think about! Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-1562817344941951632012-11-28T18:46:26.273-08:002012-11-28T18:46:26.273-08:00Linda, That is high praise from you--thank you! I...Linda, That is high praise from you--thank you! I can always count on you for a unique insight, like your observation about the comments. Where did you find the character strengths survey? Sounds interesting! And thanks for sharing some of your gifts. The adventurous one I already recognized! Thanks again for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-25582463051447633352012-11-28T18:43:26.680-08:002012-11-28T18:43:26.680-08:00Evelyn, I was so interested in your perspective of...Evelyn, I was so interested in your perspective of different cultures. I might very well be off base with my thoughts on this issue. It seems to me, though, that there is a pervasive sense of unworthiness (in spite of all the national bravado) in the US and I'm curious about its origins. Your comment has motivated me to look deeper. Thank you.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-61917450437212406682012-11-28T18:40:53.611-08:002012-11-28T18:40:53.611-08:00LeAnn, Yes, that humility thing is troublesome. T...LeAnn, Yes, that humility thing is troublesome. That's why I love that story about Bruce Lee. However, if we see our gifts as not "of us" but rather from a sacred source, then we can't really take credit for them. In that sense, we can shine our lights gladly and at the same time with humility. Thanks for your comment.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-25265929468938327562012-11-28T18:38:39.059-08:002012-11-28T18:38:39.059-08:00Bonnie, I also find this exercise difficult, even ...Bonnie, I also find this exercise difficult, even after advocating it! I have learned to accept a compliment, but my deeper good qualities are often hard for me to see. Thanks for commenting.Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-48563729391351993522012-11-28T18:37:10.674-08:002012-11-28T18:37:10.674-08:00Suzanne, Thanks for sharing your thoughts and insi...Suzanne, Thanks for sharing your thoughts and insights. What an interesting exercise at your journal writing class. I think it is so hard to see ourselves. It's like trying to look at your own face without a mirror! I'm sorry that you have had so little celebration of your successes. Long may your freak flag wave!Galen Pearlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10189831838630645863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-84545741769866220222012-11-28T14:47:39.787-08:002012-11-28T14:47:39.787-08:00Hi Galen,
Beautiful post. We do tend to shy away ...Hi Galen,<br /><br />Beautiful post. We do tend to shy away from shining the light on ourselves. I also agree that this is more prevalent among women than men. Our society has a quiet way of encouraging women to remain in the shadows, although things so seem to get better with each generation. Great food for thought. It is a powerful exercise, and I know I, for one will need to practice a bit before feeling completely comfortable. Take care and thanks for sharing.Cathy | Treatment Talkhttp://treatmenttalk.orgnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-9701261319687043542012-11-28T12:37:54.986-08:002012-11-28T12:37:54.986-08:00Galen,
i wish I had time to read the other comment...Galen,<br />i wish I had time to read the other comments, since I may repeat what others are saying, but it is individualistic culture that self hatred comes from. More communal cultures don't even have a sense of self. It is from thinking we are separate. And feeling guilty for that. (The operations of modern power.) Self judgment! It is horrible!Jodi @ Heal Nowhttp://www.healnowandforever.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3302107831896769514.post-56337036934055217952012-11-28T11:21:42.527-08:002012-11-28T11:21:42.527-08:00Hi, Galen! ~
Bravo! This is my favorite of your ...Hi, Galen! ~<br /><br />Bravo! This is my favorite of your posts to date! I especially love the story about the Dalai Lama!<br /><br />As I was reading I became very excited in anticipation of getting a glimpse of everyone's lists of gifts in the comments. I was dumbfounded that, although everyone praised the idea of the exercise, only a couple people actually shared their gifts! I think this proves your point! Very interesting...<br /><br />I asked my Sweetheart a couple days ago what my most attractive quality is so I happen to have the answer handy. He said it is the way I adore him. This jibes with the results of a character strengths survey I took not long ago which said that my #1 character strength is 'Appreciation of Beauty'.<br /><br />My son recently told me he believes my 3 most redeeming qualities are that I'm enthusiastic, adventurous and ambitious. I will own them all ;-) <br /><br />Dangerous Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12442306921276302945noreply@blogger.com